Their Eternal Love Story: A Memorial for Gabe Harvey

“Alright, I love you, bye,” was what slipped out of Gabe Harvey’s mouth the first time he spoke with Denzel Flowers over the phone.

“He completely caught himself, because who says ‘I love you’ to the person that you just started talking to over the phone,” Flowers says. “I thought it was so funny, so endearing.”

It was the summer of 2017, and Flowers, working in aquatic risk management, often visited facilities nationwide to ensure standards were met. One of the locations was a smaller city in Ontario County, N.Y., called Canandaigua: Harvey’s hometown.

Matching through a dating app, Flowers and Harvey only had a couple of days to get to know one another, and it all started with that phone call.

On July 25, 2017, the two went on a date in Niagara Falls, the spot where Flowers asked Harvey to be his boyfriend. “And the rest is kind of history from there,” Flowers says.

“I like to characterize that we were two people that were in love with life, that met each other and were able to enjoy that love together,” Flowers says.

After spending nearly seven and a half years together with Flowers as partners, Gabriel (Gabe) Harvey died on Sept. 1, 2024, after a drunk driver drove onto the patio of Park Tavern in St. Louis Park.

“Gabe was always a fiery person, he is a fiery person,” Flowers says. “He’s a Leo and I’m a Taurus, and those two definitely butt heads, but he was so full of life.”

Whether it was a swim and dive meet at Flowers’ school, Genesee Community College, social events for the athletic department, or a travel trip for work, Harvey, an extrovert at heart, was always down to accompany Flowers, an introvert.

Harvey’s school at the time was Mercy College in White Plains, N.Y., where he got his bachelor’s in human biology, working in hospital settings as a nursing assistant and healthcare specialist at Park Nicollet Methodist Hospital.

“After I met him, he was my partner in crime, and it didn’t necessarily matter what we were doing, but we knew that when we were together, we could find some fun,” Flowers says.

And fun it was, from traveling to California, Las Vegas, Texas, Colorado, Wyoming and Florida. They lived together in New Jersey through the pandemic, and eventually in 2021 settled down in Minneapolis.

Where Harvey had always loved the idea of downtown city life, Flowers adored the countryside, expressing initial doubt over moving to Minneapolis — but eventually found beauty in the hustle and bustle.

Though Flowers admits the couple went into it blindly, he says they quickly learned that though they may see differences in opinion or execution, they were always working toward the same common goal.

“It makes me so sad, because I grew up as a little boy, knowing that life was going to be a little bit more tough, and understanding that it wasn’t, you know, necessarily a life that anyone would pick to not necessarily align with social norms and heterosexual tendencies,” Flowers says. “It was always a passion of mine, or, I guess, a goal of mine, or something deep in me to find somebody that I could show the world to, and I finally found that person.”

All The Things He Is: What Gabe Harvey Loved

As a self-proclaimed foodie, Harvey’s favorite meals included something as simple as a cheeseburger and fries or something more complex like rolls of sushi, according to Flowers.

“I am very protective over Gabe, and my love language, my way of caring for him was to always make sure things were all right, all held together,” Flowers says. “He was the dreamer, and I was the planner.”

So, when Harvey would come home from work, Flowers would always make sure there was a warm meal on the table. Whether it was homemade or takeout, it was ready around midnight when Harvey got home from 16-hour work shifts at the hospital.

Not only was Harvey a connoisseur of food, but he wore both hats and loved to cook anything from a simple box of macaroni and cheese to extravagant cuisine, according to Flowers.

“He was beyond independent, he was motivated and fiercely independent,” Flowers says. “When it came to how he saw his life going and what he wanted out of it, it was so fun and fulfilling to be able to contribute to that.”

When it came to Harvey’s personality, Flowers says he always had a child-like glow, a view of the world where it didn’t matter what the situation was, he woke up early in the morning and chose positivity.

“He quite literally skipped down the halls when he worked in the ICU at Methodist,” Flowers says. “Regardless of what hospital or what co-worker, whatever person you speak to, they all give the same answer about Gabe — that he was a lover of life.”

Both enjoying an eclectic range of music, Flowers says Harvey would often steal his music, the two seeing artists from Nicki Minaj to Billie Eilish to Dua Lipa and more.

“It didn’t really matter what the vibe was, the type of music or what was going on, if it was a fun time, that’s where Gabriel wanted to be,” Flowers says.

Let The Memories Live On

Though Flowers and Harvey went on many adventures together, one of Flowers’s most cherished memories was born from a trip to Florida.

Visiting friends and family members, Flowers came down with a tonsil infection, making it difficult to talk, eat and eventually walk, after it affected his whole body.

“Gabe took such good care of me so well, even though both of us were sick as dogs,” Flowers says. “I missed that so much about him, because regardless of what we were doing, he always had my back, and I always had him.”

When Flowers wakes up, he walks over to a mantle that holds pictures of the two, along with Harvey’s urn, and greets him.

“I give him kisses every morning, and every time I go anywhere, I typically tell him where I am going, tell him that I will be back,” Flowers says.

The two also shared a furry friend, a dog named Piper, together, and according to Flowers, post-dinner walks were Harvey’s love language; a language that Flowers sustains through going on walks around the park while talking to Harvey aloud.

“Oftentimes I find myself talking to the moon, always looking up at the stars and wondering which ones are him,” Flowers says.

As a child, Harvey’s favorite color was orange, and according to Flowers he serendipitously sees the color out of nowhere, even as orange mums at the St. Paul cathedral or seasonal arrangements at his workplace for decoration.

“One thing I’ve learned, and that I’m still learning, is how to navigate that just because he’s no longer physically here doesn’t necessarily mean that my relationship with him has to change,” Flowers says. “I frame things now as even though it’s not the way that either of us expected our lives to go, I still get to have a relationship with him.”