(Bis) Mark the Spot

Leave chest-thumping to the folks on the coasts. While denizens of New York and L.A. can’t wait to tell you how swell it is to exist in their particular paradise, North Dakotans are more circumspect. They’re a modest and conservative lot, not likely to buttonhole you to extol the merits of their state.

So I’ll do it for them. Let’s start in its capitol city, Bismarck. The town arose from the confluence of steamboat traffic on the mighty Missouri River and advent of the railroad in the 1800s. It was named for Germany’s ruler, Otto von Bismarck, in hopes of currying his favor.

Didn’t work. So in typical North Dakota fashion, they set out to grow the city by themselves. In the state’s modest and budget-conscious fashion, its Capitol building boasts no gleaming dome, no marble colonnade. It looks like (and is) an office building of 19 stories, which visitors may tour.

Bob, our guide, offers this intro: “It’s like walking into a work of art”: all Art Deco, with a Prairie wheat motif. Its Hall of Fame hails locals like bandleader Lawrence Welk as well as Teddy Roosevelt—not a native, but he did rough-ride through these parts. Peek into the legislative chambers, the Supreme Court’s room, and, tip-top, an art-filled observatory.

From there, you’ll spot two don’t-miss museums, starting with the Gateway to Science, which debuted in 2023 on a hilltop overlooking the Missouri River. It features 40-plus hands-on stations at which to, say, track your bloodstream’s journey or simulate laser surgery. Adults elbow kids out of the way—it’s that much fun.

The North Dakota Heritage Center & State Museum showcases some of the many dinosaur skeletons unearthed in the state, plus an intro to its five Tribal Nations, where, interactively, you can make your choice of arrow to “hunt” bison and listen to settlers’ portraits spring to life to relate their stories.

Drive along Hwy. 1804 and you’ll experience the very same, very untouched landscape that its first explorers traversed. Hit the ground running at Fort Abraham Lincoln State Park, home of troops stationed under General Custer’s command (tour his house, too). Head next to On A Slant, the Mandan tribe’s village of 1575 with its earth-covered lodges.

Explorers Lewis and Clark over-wintered in Knife River Indian Village, where today its Visitors Center showcases beautiful beadwork, a traditional earth lodge and its adjoining tobacco garden. This was the village of Sacajawea—the Native young woman who acted as their interpreter along what’s now known as the Lewis & Clark Trail.

Double Ditch Village, vibrant from 1490 until decimated by smallpox the white men introduced in 1785, is the site saluting the remains of 32 lodges: one of the most spectacular archaeological sites in the entire Midwest. At the excellent Lewis & Clark Interpretive Center, explore those explorers’ collection of books and gifts for Natives along their journey as well as medicines: a bleeding bowl; dental forceps, a gouger(!). When the river froze over, they wintered among the local Mandan (and nearly starved).

Present-day settler Jake Doan, who runs his family’s 160-acre Black Leg Ranch, which his great-grandfather homesteaded (“My relatives back in England were a bunch of outlaws, who either fled the law or were hanged”) and where his grandfather was born on the kitchen table, now raises 2,500 head of cattle on the land. “But,” he instructs, “We’re in the grass business. People are raping the land, and we need more raw, clean food, not chemicals dumped into it.”

As land stewards, “We’re not succession-grazing our herd,” constantly moving it all over the property; rather, “intensive mob-grazing: Eat it clean for two days, then let it regenerate for a year. All our cattle are grass-fed and grass-finished.

“My brother has also started a hunting venture; and we’ve launched a brewery (Bison brand). In other words, we’re selling an experience,” he instructs. Soon to come: an event center, maybe a boutique hotel with a farm-to-table kitchen.

Back closer to the outskirts of Bismarck, we visited the United Tribes Technical College and its gift shop (shopping op for beadwork, blankets, books and more), which also tells the story of WW II’s Japanese Internment Camp on the site, with barracks still standing—another shameful moment in American history.

A stroll through Bismarck’s downtown leads visitors to the Governor’s Mansion, a Victorian beauty outside (not so much, inside) harboring juicy scandals to unfold. A stop at the site of Camp Hancock of 1872 shares space with a gay, red-and-black-clad church, the town’s oldest building. (Speaking of old: Two more blocks and you’re at an intriguing antiques mall.)

A murals tour explores now-prettified alleys (close to a dozen vibrant artworks on Alley 5.5 alone), while a DIY art tour visits a cluster of galleries along with the Downtown Artists Co-op (ogle a painted guitar plus elegant beadwork bouquets). Nearby, Capitol Gallery showcases, among others, works by Native artist Butch Thunder Hawk.

Time for dinner. You’ll find ramen, you’ll find enchiladas; you’ll find primo fish & chips at Blarney Stone —but also Bismarck’s spin on hometown fare. Hit Brick Oven for your morning java, complete with pastries galore. Don’t miss Butterhouse, a quietly elegant eatery within original brick walls, where my brunchtime Asparagus Benedict and peach-guava Mimosa made me purr.

Seek fine dining at Pirogue for local spins on Midwest faves. Find donuts galore at Bearscat Bakehouse. Cross the river to sister city Mandan and head to Frieds for plate lunches and homemade pies from the good old days (with prices to match). And maybe, it’s even National Mashed Potato Day. Find out by stopping at Mandan’s National Day calendar company’s HQ to learn which celebrations make the cut on their popular (Target, Walmart) calendars.

For more info, visit www.noboundariesnd.com.

Gay-friendly venues:
Laughing Sun Brewery
The CraftCade (special Pride drink)
Brick Oven Bakery (Rainbow heart cookies)

Far(go) Out!
Fargo is to North Dakota what Austin is to Texas: a blue dot in a sea of red. Cruising downtown’s venues, you’ll spot many a welcoming rainbow flag at shops such as LGBT-owned Scribble Lady, offering gay merch including rainbow flags, nice-to-naughty greeting cards, and Queer Queen iron-on patches.

Grab breakfast at Marge’s, decorated in shades-of-the-Fifties collections of salt-and-pepper shakers and cookie jars to gird you for a DIY tour of the town’s marvy murals (maps available) and a stop at the Plains Art Museum (free admission), currently showcasing quirky-to-provocative pieces on loan from a queer collector.

Cross over to twin town Moorhead, where the Hjemkomst Center displays a locally-built and sailed repro of a Viking ship, a replica of a medieval Norwegian stave church, and a moving Right to Marry exhibit, complete with heartfelt testimonials.

Visit Brewhalla, a new food hall (think: taproom, oyster bar, local ice cream, a cheese and fish deli, and gift shops) before enjoying dinner at Rosewild, within the rustic-chic Jasper Hotel (Swedish meatballs to Parmesan walleye to hotdish pot pie) or Prairie Kitchen, saluting more meatballs, along with a lefse platter, bison tenderloin and Nordic banh mi.

That—and a whole lot more—is why the town’s mottos is “North of Normal.” Truth in advertising: Bring it on! For info, check out www.fargomoorhead.org. Also scroll through Lavender’s archives for a intro to Fargo story from 2021.