Leather Life: Kinky

A Poem Cycle

1. I’m not kinky.
I’m not kinky. I’m not.
I’m not kinky. Really, I’m not.
I’m really not kinky.
I’m not really kinky.
I’m not that kinky.
I’m not kinky like that.
I don’t consider myself kinky.

2. I’m not kinky, but sometimes I wonder.
I’m not that kinky, but I enjoy a little slap and tickle sometimes.
I’m not really kinky, but sometimes I just need to get beaten up a bit, you know?
I’m not, like, kinky, but, you know, sometimes I sorta am.
I’m not exactly kinky, but I maybe skirt the edges of it a bit.
I’m not predominantly kinky, but sometimes I play on the margins a little.
I’m not usually kinky, but there are times . . .
I’m not completely kinky, but I’m kinky enough.
I’m not totally kinky, but I’m mostly kinky.
I’m not 100% kinky. Like, maybe, 75%?

3. I’m not kinky, unless you call liking to get spanked kinky.
I’m not kinky, other than having all these piercings.
I’m not kinky, aside from my love of cross-dressing.
I’m not kinky, except that I like to have my tits played with. Really hard. Does that count?

4. I’m not really kinky, but whips and chains excite me.
I’m not really kinky, but I get off on getting tied up.
I’m not really kinky, but the thought of submission makes me hard.
I’m not really kinky, but I could be for the right person.
I’m not really kinky, but I could be for you.

5. I might be kinky. Does worshipping boots make me kinky?
I’m probably kinky. I like to flog people.
I’m definitely kinky. All my slaves say so.

6. Does this corset make me look kinky?
Does this singletail make me look kinky?
Does this fisting glove make me look kinky?

7. Wow, you mean I’m kinky?

8. I’m kinky, but you’d never know it.
I’m kinky, but I don’t look like it.
I’m kinky, but I don’t show it.
I’m kinky, but I don’t talk about it.
I’m sort of kinky, but I don’t act like it.
I’m kind of kinky, but I don’t do much about it.
I’m a bit kinky.
I’m a little kinky.
I’m somewhat kinky.
I’m mostly kinky.
I’m pretty much kinky.
I’m really kinky.
I’m totally kinky.
I’m completely kinky.
I’m 100% kinky.
I am so fucking kinky!

9. I’m so kinky that even my hair is kinky.
Even my pubic hair is kinky.
Even my spine is kinky.
I am kinkier than ten cat-o-nine-tails,
a thousand floggers,
a million singletails,
I’m so kinky that there are no hankie code colors for what I’m into.
They haven’t been invented yet.
Perhaps something like ultraviolet—
Not visible to the naked eye.

10. See him? I’m kinkier than him.
See her? The one with the latex kitten suit? I’m kinkier than her.
The guy with the leather and chains?
The gal with the goth look?
The guy with all the needles stuck in him?
The gal in the vacuum frame?
The guy who’s tied up in a cage?
The gal who looks like Bettie Page?
I’m kinkier than any of them.
I’m kinkier than all of them put together.
I’m kinkier than every porn star and every politician combined.
And that’s pretty kinky.

11. See that blonde with the violet wand? I’m kinkier than that.
See that frail with the singletail? I’m kinkier than that.
See that bear in his underwear?
See that jock wearing just a sock?
See that dude flexing in the nude?
I’m kinkier than that.
See that Jack with the marked-up back? I’m kinkier than that.
See that Jane in the lock and chain? I’m kinkier than that.
See that John getting pissed upon?
See that Stu with the wild tattoo?
See that Nick with the piercèd dick?
I’m kinkier than that.
See that Newt in the latex suit? I’m kinkier than that.
See that Faye in the bustier? I’m kinkier than that.
See that Norm in the uniform?
See that pup getting all tied up?
See that chick with the snap-on dick?
I’m kinkier than that.

12. I’m too kinky for my jeans
Too kinky for my jock
Too kinky for my boots
Too kinky for my gloves
Too kinky for my vest
Too kinky for my hankies
Too kinky for my harness
But I’m not too kinky for you.

13. You ask, just how kinky am I?
How kinky am I?
I don’t know.
Are you ready to find out?